Saturday, May 4, 2013

4 days

That is the amount of time I have left until I will drive myself, a large coffee, a water bottle, seven packs of sugarless gum and perhaps one small snack size bag of gummy bears to the library at WOU where I will be locked away in a tiny room to begin the first of 8.5 long and painful hours of comprehensive exams.

It's been four years in process to get to this stage and while I've theoretically completed all the coursework necessary to pass these things, with each passing day and ticking down of the minutes I feel less and less prepared for this. I've had the questions for a couple months and have been studying for weeks now, but I don't know where it has all gone. I dream of it every night. Perhaps it flitters out of my mind somewhere in the great abyss.

I hope once they shut the door, confiscate all my electronics and leave me with nothing but my brain food of coffee and sugar, that it all becomes a Zen like moment of clarity and the words just flow from my fingers complete with properly cited theorists, and specific examples.

Until then, I'll keep cramming, hoping and learning.  After all, when all is completed, I can finally fulfill my life long dream of being a teacher.......hey wait a minute.....

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